University

University is a term I came to be familiar with pretty much as soon as I started school at the age of 5. Education, to my parents, is everything. It's understandable, of course. If it weren't for their educations, they probably wouldn't be where they are today (which is a pretty good place).

All my life though, the pressure's always been on. Every year I would be yelled at because of my grades when we got report cards. They were just never good enough. I suppose since I'm sort of an emotionally weak person, my dad's always been able to pick on that. He always used to tell me things like:

"All I've wanted from you, as my daughter, is for you to be the best,"

"I never got the kind of opportunities you do here, and yet I was the best student in my province, so why aren't you?"

"Ever since the day you started school, I've waited for you to excel and you still haven't,"

"If someone else can get a perfect, why can't you?"

"You'll never be anything without education and when I die, you'll be my biggest regret."

As a result, I've always strived to do well at school. I'm in Grade 12 now and my dad still has never said he was proud of my marks. As much as I want to be a good daughter and please him, I guess it's just not going to happen. I'm sorry he wasted 18 years of his life hoping for something that would never happen.

On another note though, I've been accepted to university. We were hoping I would get in to OttawaU and I did, but not with as prestigious a scholarship as he hoped. Even though I've been accepted, I didn't get in with the grades I wanted either. The grades that allowed me entrance to university were mediocre, nothing to be proud of. Certainly nothing for my dad to be proud of either. I know he's always wanted to have conversations with his friends and be able to tell them good things about me. Unfortunately, there's nothing good about me to talk about. I just hope he doesn't waste another 18 years of his life waiting to find something good enough about me to be glad about.

Sorry, dad.